Georgia Man Successfully Puts Gun Back In Holster At Gas Station But Also Shoots His Dick Clear Off

GEORGIA – A Macon man was treated at Coliseum Northside hospital Thursday after he accidentally shot himself in the penis. The man was parked at the gas station at about 9:30 p.m. when he attempted to holster his .45. Immediately after the gun went off, he drove to a friend’s house in Lake Wildwood. When he got to the friends house, he took off his pants and saw that he had “shot himself in the penis and that the bullet exited out of his buttocks.” The spent round fell onto the floor. The man’s friend drove him to Coliseum Northside hospital and he was then transferred to the Medical Center of Central Georgia.

WHOOPS! Guess that’ll teach him to for some reason have his gun out while pumping gas. But that’s neither here nor there. I don’t even care about how Yosemite Sam managed to fire his weapon in a downward trajectory that the projectile not only blows off his cock but still exits through his buttcheek. There’s either a second gunman on the grassy knoll or that’s one magic bullet. Doesn’t matter. I NEED to know how good of a “friend” this dude thinks he has to be to show up at his doorstep with literally nothing but his dick in his hand. What. The. Fuck does he expect his buddy to do? Give him a few shots of whiskey, close the wound with a hot iron and sew that shit back on? Come to think of it, maybe. Intriguing nonetheless.